I haven't really slept well the last couple of nights. Last night I was thinking about spirituality and wondering where my loss of belief in Mormonism has left me. Discovering the lies and deceptions within Mormonism threw all of my religious and spiritual beliefs into question. All that remained was a pretty sensitive hole that I've mostly stayed away from. I've escaped into rationalism and agnosticism but I don't think that that really completely represents who I am and what I believe. You see, last night I remembered that I believed in God and that I believe strongly in the power and necessity of faith.
Those beliefs don't have anything to do with Mormonism or organized religion but I feel like I need to sift through the rubble of my lost beliefs and rediscover the gems that might be there. Otherwise I'll be letting Mormonism rob me of treasures that it has no claims on.
5 comments:
Maybe god is there...I have to hope that I was created for a purpose and not just a genetic abhoration! :)
I wrestle with the same issues. I usually tell people that for now, Mormonism ruined God for me. I haven't been in a big hurry to find a new one, but I do see where faith and believing in something larger than yourself, and in a "big picture" provide a certain comfort. I really like the philosophies of Humanism, because they put a big emphasis on compassion and sociel responsibility. I also just read an interesting essay by Steven Pinker about the evolutionary advantages of following the golden rule.
I have lost sleep the last couple nights by simply blogging. Not feeling so well today because of it. But it sure was fun.
I'm thinking you'll find your spirituality again to fill that void that you feel.
Calvin and Hobbes.
I'm serious.
The perspective of a precocious child can do wonders for an outlook at 3:00am when you've got insomnia, you're tossing and turning, and every other breath feels like an existential crisis.
C&H saved me back in '95. I have the complete collection in library, just in case, for those "rainy days" of the soul.
How can you have a spiritual life if you have rejected spiritual feelings as simple physical manifestations that prove nothing?
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